One Year with Amy Jane

If you're thinking, "Hey, wasn't Amy Jane's birthday almost a month ago?" then you would be correct, but the four weeks since her birthday have been super crazy (including two full weeks that we were out of town) so I am just now getting around to this post that all six of you care about. 

However, even if it's only for my own personal record/memories, I like writing this stuff down and having it to look back on. I love that if I want to (even though I rarely have) I can reread posts from when Alice was a baby because there are SO many little details that I have forgotten already and if I know one thing, it's that my memory and brain cells are depleting at an even faster rate these days. Not to mention I have definitely had some the typical mom guilt for over-documenting my firstborn and slightly neglecting to do the same for my second baby. I mean, yes, there's been a pandemic. But still. 

It's so crazy to me that this baby is one. In some ways the year, Covid and all, flew by. Other times, it's hard to remember life before Amy Jane completed our family (yes, I said completed, as in finished, as in done, as in no more children, Mom). I think my transition from one to two children has had its own unique and unexpected learning curve since so many tools in my parenting toolbox (Chick-fil-A playground! Y childcare! Story time!) have been taken away... it feels like the tools and the box itself all got tossed in the trash. But, alas. We have made it and through all the insanity and uncertainty of this past year, Amy Jane (like all the 2020 babies!) has been the constant, joyful sunshine we needed. I've said before that it's a bummer that her first year of life will forever be inextricably tied to this horrible virus, but she's literally kept me sane on a lot of days when that felt impossible. So, thanks for joining us, little bean.  

Weight/Length: She just had her 12 month checkup so I actually know this! For a few months we were concerned about her weight gain (or lack of it, really) and finally realized that actually she just wanted to be eating solid food at any and all moments of the day. HA! So she's 18.5 pounds and 31.5 inches long, which for reference is 2 pounds lighter and 2 full inches longer than Alice was at 15 months. She's a string bean like her daddy! She's finally back on the growth chart at 17th percentile for weight and--unsurprisingly--96th for height. It's such a relief to know she's growing like she should!

Nicknames: Bean. Beanie Baby. Sweet Potato. Sissy. Sisert. 

Sleep: She's doing great! Still sleeping about 12 hours at night and taking a good nap in the afternoon. She's been an angel sleeper almost from day one and I would love to take credit for that but I can't so don't come at me with your pitchforks. It's God's gift to me after my epidural didn't work. 

Eating: We made it to one full year of nursing and as of last week she's officially weaned! I'm not sad about it (goodness, it was hard this time around, probably because of her crazy sister trying to destroy my home while I was completely helpless to stop her for 30-40 minutes at a time) but I'm proud to have done it for a whole year because I wanted to quit after like a month. 😊 Meanwhile, her appetite rivals Alice's and she eats literally anything and everything. Stir fry, green beans, sweet potatoes, and rice have been some of her recent favorites. Also it's pretty impressive what she manages to put away considering she still has zero teeth. 

Clothing: She's all over the place depending on style and brand, but mostly 9 months and some 12 months. I just put away a bunch of 6-9 and 6-12 month things. Separates are tricky so she wears a lot of dresses!

Mood: We were just laughing today because she's so happy and LOUD at home but when we go out she mostly just stares at people with a judgy look (honestly, same 😂) and refuses to smile. I think it's just a remnant of the first few months of her life when she barely saw another soul outside our house. She is super smiley and giggly most of the time but lately she's started SCREAMING this horrid piercing scream when she doesn't get what she wants (which is almost always food and/or freedom to crawl around and find things to put in her mouth. (so, more food). 

Loves: Her sister, especially when Alice yells things at her, which Amy Jane finds hilarious and I... don't.

-Her daddy. She does a happy dance and squeals his name when he gets home every day!

-White noise. Why I didn't use this with Alice I don't know but it's a lifesaver.

-Riding in the stroller (and now shopping carts!)

-Taking bubble baths with her sister

-Eating. Always.

Doesn't Love: Waiting for food.

-Lack of attention (fortunately this is rare).

-Riding in the car

-When her big mean sister steals her toys

-Alone time (she has a lot to learn)

-Almost anyone besides her parents holding her (we're working on it. Again- covid baby!)

What I Want to Remember/Milestones: Well, her Baby Yoda birthday party was pretty awesome. It all turned out exactly how I imagined in (thanks to Gigi) and I just loved it. She looked so cute in her little Yoda ears and it was unique and funny and perfect. We got to spend time with all the grandparents and some other family this past month, which was fun. She's kind of walking... more like pulling up and stumbling from one thing she can hold onto to the next. I think her record is six steps and honestly I'm fine with that. She flew three more times this month and did pretty well (thankfully her little screaming trick developed mostly after those). She can say yeah, mama, dadda, Papa, Gigi, Nana, and (we think) sissy. I love her long, wispy hair, giant eyes, fake laugh (the one she does when the rest of us are laughing and she just wants to join in), the funny way she says "daDA" when she's excited to see Jonathan, her bed head and huge smile in the morning, her blowing kisses... I look at her at least once a day and wish I could freeze time. She's just so sweet.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Easter next week for sure. This really feels like Amy Jane's first Easter because last year we were in actual quarantine and it was all online but this year she'll also be old enough to look for eggs (with a little assistance!) and I know she and Alice are going to have so much fun with that. Also, SUMMER. Well, not the heat or humidity or bugs or desperation. But pool days and having Jonathan home? YES. I have a few ideas/plans for this summer and I want it to be really special. Other than that, we're just kind of on a hamster wheel over here with nothing much coming up. 

Me: Ah, the million dollar question. (NOT. But wouldn't that be nice??) I am okay. The last few weeks/months have been hard for several reasons, mainly that between weaning, switching birth control (tmi? sorry), traveling, and just stress my hormones have gone full-blown CRAZY on me and the physical and mental toll has been pretty significant. Things have taken a turn for the better just this weekend actually so I'm very thankful for that and crossing my fingers that it stays that way and this isn't a fluke. Also, it's the thick of golf season (Jonathan is a coach) so I have a lot of really long days alone with the girls right now (and for several more weeks) so that's challenging. There's a loneliness to stay-at-home motherhood that is present no matter what but the regular human/adult interactions that I was able to have through the gym or whatever are no more so I think it's getting to me more than usual. (Although there are probably childcare workers at the Y who aren't sad they don't have to have awkwardly long conversations with me anymore.) 

Anyway. I'm fine. March is always a weird month that seems to stretch out forever even before the Demon March of last year (no offense, Amy Jane, as it is your birth month) and that I want to end inexplicably since that's only ushering in hotter temperatures that I am in no way prepared for. I've been reading a lot, as usual but this is the only thing I've really written in weeks and honestly I don't feel the pull to it like I usually do. I think I'm just not in a season or rhythm of output right now and that's totally okay. Somehow I think the internet will survive without more of my content/"charm, wit, and sparkling dinner conversation." (If you understand that reference there's a solid chance we will be best friends.) 

I wanted this to be more celebratory of Amy Jane and reflective of life with two girls and a lot of other things, but it is what it is. I can share those things another time. But I truly did want to acknowledge the gift of this sweet little baby and the perfect timing of her arrival (in more ways than one!) and the absolute delight that she is to us every single moment. Jonathan is a total sucker for her, Alice is obsessed with her (dangerously, sometimes 😂) and I kiss her about a million times a day and never get tired of it. 

We love you, Amy Jane. Thanks for being in our family. Please stop screaming.